


Empty Kiss

by PhoenixofFire177



Series: Types of Kisses [6]
Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: M/M, Texting, angst's back, awful kiss, back again, barba ignores it, bc hes trapped in a relationship, dont start something like this, dont stay in something like this, guess whos back (back back), im sorry but this had to happen, like physically giving ppl money, liv drops a truth bomb, loveless dating, more cursing, paying for unhealthy habits, sonny is an asshole, still no coffee joke, tell a friend, this is what a negative relationship looks like kiddos, unhealthy addictions, unhealthy supporting of addictions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-26
Updated: 2017-06-26
Packaged: 2018-11-19 11:06:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11312085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PhoenixofFire177/pseuds/PhoenixofFire177
Summary: When one of you doesn't kiss back; just the stoic feeling of their lips on yours. It's empty, like no one even cares anymore.





	Empty Kiss

**Author's Note:**

> Here's that angst y'all wanted.

Going through the motions was perhaps the best way to describe what Rafael and Sonny were doing. They woke up, readied themselves for the day, and went to work, barely interacting with one another aside from occasional inane comments like “we’re out of soap again”. 

They left separately, as they did every day, and neither thought about the other until later that night. Rafael usually worked late; he had no reason not to. But every night, exactly at 11, he’d get a text. Nothing particularly special, as the only time it changed was when the location of the sender did. He would respond each time with one word: 

Okay.

Work would then carry on as planned until he returned home. The apartment was empty as he expected and Rafael tried to ignore the pang in his chest. Sonny arrived home around 2, like he did every night. He’d stumble into bed, breath sour with whatever alcohol had been bought for him by handsy patrons in filthy bars surrounding that month’s motel. Sometimes Rafael could still smell the scent of the seedy places his detective frequented. He simply resigned to give Sonny the shower first tomorrow morning. 

It was their routine and it worked, no matter what she said. 

Olivia was tired of sitting around and letting her friend get worse. With each passing day, Rafael became more and more compliant with his partner’s rogue interests. She tried her hardest to convince him to let it go, to let Sonny go. 

 

He refused every time. Honestly, Rafael was no better than a child when it came to giving things up. Especially his romantic partners. Naturally, Olivia had to intervene. The ADA was her friend after all and as his friend, she had to look out for him. It wasn’t like anyone else was going to. 

She invited him out for drinks that night knowing full well he wouldn’t refuse. Not when free booze was on the table. They arrived at the bar separately and almost immediately, Rafael placed his phone on the bar in front of him. He was waiting for something. Or rather, someone. 

Sure enough, a text came through precisely at 11. He came alive then, enthusiastically replying and Liv managed to catch a glimpse of the conversation. 

140 to Midnight Motel.  
Okay.  
This was getting ridiculous. Something had to be done and fast. 

“Rafael, what’s going on between you and Carisi? You two haven’t been together as much.” 

Her friend bristled and snapped at her in response. 

“Nothing you need to worry about. Sonny and I are fine, thank you.” 

A lie if she’d ever heard one. He didn’t want her finding out something. Obviously than meant she’d have to push harder. Continuing to push would mean resistance but Olivia was certain it would be for the best. It had to be. 

“Rafael, we are friends, aren’t we? As your friend, I want to help you.” 

A pause. 

“I know that you two aren’t romantically involved anymore.” 

That seemed to trigger something within him, something painful and repressed. It clawed its way to the surface and reared its ugly head. Rafael’s shoulders sagged and he stared down at his half-full glass of scotch in distaste. 

“I don’t love him. Maybe I thought I did, hell, maybe I actually did at one point but… I look at him next to me in our bed and I feel… nothing.” 

He shrugged, as if admitting he didn’t feel anything for the detective he’d been dating for six months was no more than telling someone that the sky was blue or water was wet. She wished she could say she was surprised yet… something in her was grimly unshaken. She’d expected this much. 

“Then what was that text about?” 

Olivia fixed her friend with a glare despite him not meeting her eyes. If they weren’t together, why did he still talk to Carisi? Why were they still living in the same house? 

“He was checking in. Sonny is late most nights so he checks in with me. It’s his way of telling me to leave the door unlocked.” 

“Barba, he mentioned a hotel! What is going on with my detective?!” 

She paused, thinking back to the number in the text. There was no way it was just a random number. The Midnight Motel’s address wasn’t anything close to a 140… 

“Are you paying off my detective?!” 

Rafael snorted, shaking his head. 

“Hardly. Sonny has no use for my money buying his silence. We simply live around each other; no more, no less.” 

“Is he seeing anyone else, Rafael?” 

Silence.

“Rafael, you need to tell me.” 

“Yes.” 

Sonny was cheating on him. Sonny was cheating on Rafael with random people and her friend was letting it happen. He left the door unlocked for Sonny every night and just went about his life like nothing happened. 

“Why would you let him?”

"If it makes him happy, Olivia, I'll pay the fucking hotel bill. Just as long as he stays.”

Oh. Well that certainly put things into perspective. 

“Is that what you’ve been doing? Paying for Carisi’s trysts?”

“Good night, Olivia. I have to be home before he is. He’ll need help getting sober.” 

“Rafael, wait! You can’t stay with him; it’s not healthy for either of-”

He didn’t even look back. 

Rafael arrived at their apartment half an hour after Sonny. He wasn’t at all surprised to see his detective laying on the sofa, still in his work clothes. Sighing heavily, he nudged the man, coaxing him to bed. Sonny threw his suit in the corner of their bedroom before turning towards their bed. 

Before he sat down, Rafael pulled him closer. 

“Liv talked to me after work.” 

“Was something wrong with a case?” 

“No, Sonny. She was worried about us. She mentioned it was unhealthy for us to keep living like this.” 

“Did she now? What did you say to that?” 

Rafael sighed, gently pressing a kiss to Sonny’s unyielding lips out of habit. He felt…

“Nothing.” 

But that wasn’t anything new.


End file.
